Tips for Weaning the Pacifier
Thinking about weaning your baby’s pacifier can feel so overwhelming. Here are some steps to help you know when + how to do it.
When To Do It
I like to remind parents that pacifiers aren’t “bad” - they can help with SIDS prevention in baby’s first year of life and with soothing and comfort after that. The general guidelines for weaning (based on the AAP and AAPD recommendations) set a goal of between 2-3 years old to prevent longer-term oral health and development effects. If your baby has had ear infections, talk with your care team – there is some data that pacifiers may contribute to increased ear infections.
When Not To Do It
I know that it’s hard to find a time when it feels “right” to wean a pacifier – so much happens in toddler years that it can feel like a constant whirlwind. And pacifiers do offer so much comfort. I think of them in terms of child development – try to avoid times of big change or disruption in your daily lives. For example, you might wait to wean if your child/family:
+ has an illness or is teething
+ is dealing with a lot of separation anxiety
+ is neurodivergent or has sensory sensitivity (work with your care team)
+ has a chronic medical condition (work with your care team)
+ is going through a bit transition (a big move, new sibling, etc.)
How to Do It
Once you feel like you are all ready, here are some tips that can help:
Start Slow. Start by phasing out use of the pacifier at non-sleep times and focus on just naps and nighttime.
Once you’re using a pacifier only around sleep, you can use any number of strategies to help your child understand that a transition is coming and that you’ll be there with them through it all. Toddlers are concrete thinkers, so the more concrete ideas you provide, the more they will understand what is happening.
Paci Fairy: @BigLittleFeelings describes this in wonderful detail. You explain that the Paci Fairy is coming to take the pacifier, make it a big celebration, practice with your toddler, and engage them in the process.
Planting a Paci Garden: You explain that the pacifier is soon going to turn into a beautiful garden of flowers, make it a big event, have your toddler help you with digging up dirt, planning the garden, making a sign for it, engaging them in the process. You can plant all of the pacifiers in a garden/backyard/pot and then plant flowers that grow in place of the pacifiers.
Giving them to the Pediatrician: A lot of patients do this with us in the office! You explain that at their 2 or 3 year old visit, the pediatrician collects their pacifiers as part of their growing up. You can explain that they’ll get something as a reward (if that feels right in your family), have them help you with finding an envelope or box, decorating it, engaging them in the process, and working with your pediatrician.
Replace It With Another Soothing Item. You can try lots of things to help -- a lovey, or a pillow, or a small blanket (safe after 2 years old in bed). Some kids with more sensory sensitivities or oral tendencies might prefer a chewing silicone straw.
Resources
No matter which idea you pick, the key is preparing your child, explaining in concrete terms what will happen to the pacifier and what they can expect (it might be hard for a little bit, it’s okay to miss your pacifier, etc.), and engaging them in the process. Here are some resources to help.
Books for different ages:
TV Shows:
It may be hard for some time after the pacifier is gone - sleep patterns might change, your little one might miss it, and it might require a lot of extra TLC for a bit. But I promise, it will get easier. And you can all do it – you’re amazing, and you’ll do just great.
